Scoop! Journalists in Fiction

The editor

In its loftiest form an editorship invites the journalist to perform a role of influence on the national stage, to engage in powerful and influential debate on matters of public interest, to challenge and shape governments (Ian McEwan's Amsterdam). Even at local level, the editor is well-placed, even obliged to become a pillar of the community.

Like Septimus Henry Kew, editor of the Crow (The Water Clock, Jim Kelly), and otherwise known as Woggle. Henry is tall and dessicated like a human praying mantis, with a small, stick insect body.

(His) thin frame, like a vision in a fairground mirror, enabled him to project his head around corners without revealing any other part of his body.

He has a tendency to 'extend his neck obscenely from his collar', allowing Philip Dryden to imagine his head turning through 360 degrees.

(Henry's) sex life appeared to be confined to the plain brown envelopes (which contain videotapes) and lifetime membership of the Boy Scout movement.

A poor manager, Henry lives above the Crow's High Street office, and occasionally appears in full scout unform, hence the nickname.

Henry was a stickler for the correct channels - one reason why was a lousy journalist.

The Crucible's editor (Exit, Bedford), Dougal Aitken-Aitken is of a different cut. No Scout uniform but his attire is just as telling - blue and white striped shirt with a white collar, pale green tie and red braces. He is the youngest editor in the group, his rise explained by the nickname Frugal Dougal.

The era of the high story count at the Crucible had dawned with daa appointment, an early memo setting out story quotas and word ceilings required by the redesign from broadsheet to tabloid. If it can't be told in ten pars, it ain't worth telling.

Loving the news editor

News editor is one of the toughest jobs on a paper, located bang on the fault line between management and workforce. It is a high pressure position that requires a sharp news sense, quick reflexes and ordered mind, complemented by well-developed diplomatic, motivational and social skills. As very few people have this mix it usually means the encumbent is unpopular with almost everyone; as ideal candidates are hard to come by many editors resort to appointing a self-centred, slightly paranoid bully.

Not so, the editor of the Crow (The Water Clock, Jim Kelly). who has appoint the ineffectual Bill Bracken.

... a striking illustration of the editor's ability to award jobs on the basis of inverse qualification ... in line with this innovaticve policy of positive discimination (Bracken) had got the news editor's job on the grounds that he was unable to deal with stress.

More typical is Lisa Marklund's Ingvar Johansson (Bomber) who can just about bring himself to briefly compliment Annika on a story.

"It's not bad," Ingvar Johansson said, turning around. "But that's all history. Tomorrow's paper is all that matters now."

Like all news editors is Johansson is driven by the constant fear that however well his team performs a rival might still get a better line (Studio 69).

"How the hell could we miss that angle? Maybe you could tell me that?"

Ink's news editor is Battersby

Battersby wore his hair brushed forward in a Nero style that made him look as if he were backing into a breeze. A jagged fringe hung down over his forehead. He had an abrupt manner and was apt to shut at people without warning. It wasn't clear if this was a way of trying impose his authority, or some neurological complaint he was unable to control.

Exit's news editor, Gary, is always up against deadlines, always fearful of the next yawningly empty newslist. Hence this exchange, when Constance is interviewing the manger of a shop called Fruits of the Churn. The phone rings...

"You've to return to base immediately," said the shop manager, smiling, as he replaced the receiver.

"Did they give a name?"

"Gary someone or other on newsdesk. Nice chap. He said 'Tell her fuck the cheese feature and get her arse back to the office'."

Quite.